HEY, flattery, go die alone

hey lady pretty is a better compliment than hot

I’ve started a reading list of about 20 books I want to read this year. But ideally I want to read 40. That’s a different blog post. TODAY, I want to mention a book I just started reading, “10 Stupid Things Women Do To Mess Up Their Lives” by 90’s woman Dr. Laura Schlessinger.

My favorite part so far is when she talks about people who go around trying to “soul search” or to find themselves, and how ineffective it is on account of how finding yourself comes through your actions. She describes finding your purpose as a moment-by-moment concept, as in we choose to do certain things, and therein can discover our purpose for that moment or action. Then, of course, all that leads to bigger actions, but no self-discovery is ever found by inaction. Deep.

About the graphic up there, I watched the video below a couple days ago, saw it on Pinterest, and while he seems a little intense (WHY SO MUCH YELLING), he makes a good point! Start at 2:13.

And flattery is something that I’ve struggled with resisting in the past. I’m hoping I’m not the only one that has a history of gravitating to perhaps the wrong kinds of guys because they’re good with the compliments. It’s so much more meaningful to fall for someone because of a relationship developed over time, with a depth from personality and observations of their actions, rather than because they always comment on how nice your [insert body part of choice here] is.

Example:

When a guy compliments my below-the-neck physical features, I feel:

  • like I want you to stop looking at me
  • embarrassed and uncomfortable that they noticed
  • uncomfortable thinking how many times they may have noticed previously
  • a little flattered
  • guilty for feeling flattered

When a guy compliments my above-the-neck physical features (my eyes/hair/smile/etc), I feel:

  • pleasantly surprised
  • like I can’t stop smiling or thinking about it for days
  • a little shy
  • super flattered
  • really pretty

When a guy compliments my non-physical features (personality/brain/heart/talents/etc), I feel:

  • when’s the wedding date
  • completely shocked that anyone would notice
  • a deep personal gratitude
  • like a person respected for being a meaningful human being, and not like an object
  • I probably will write about it in my journal

Keep up-to-date on my new postings by following me on Twitter. You can also contact me through my website here, email me at brittany@lacelollipops.com, or send me a message to my Facebook. Thank you!

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